Sunday, November 23, 2014

you can't swing a dead cat in washington without hitting a closeted homosexual!

this morning sophia and i wrenched our limp bodies out of bed and trudged to the theatre to see "outrage", kirby dick's new film examining closeted gay politicians & the impact their refusal to publicly idenfity themselves has on shaping their positions on gay rights. i was not prepared for the amount of names, dates, or verifiable sources the movie manages to secure. among the coterie of cowards there were two significant indivduals that left a dirty taste in my mouth.

charlie crist, pictured here in a slutty belly shirt, is a slimy, spineless individual that "outrage" spent a lot of time exposing. in his youth, he subscribed to basic liberal tenets of freedom and equality BUT! when he was approached by republican backers that wanted to employ him as a political figure, he pulled a swift 180 and embraced the most conservative of political ideologies. from attorney general, he wiggled his way to the office of governor, which he ran for on a platform that contained a multitude of awful, dangerous policy measures, including: anti-abortion access, support of a closed border policy, support of the death penalty, and support for a federal amendment banning same-sex marriage. since his election, he has managed to raise tuition costs of public universities, upheld florida's ban on gay parents adopting children, appointed two extremely fucked up conservatives to the state's supreme court, and furthered the rights of citizens to carry concealed weapons (the permits for which are NOT public record). this guy even suported an initiative to offer christian-themed license plates, which residents could opt to buy & and would feature jesus christ either suspended on the cross, or gazing pensively out of a stained glass window (lol). the movie features interviews with gay members of his fraternity, who explain how crist used the frathouse as a gay bar, coming back every september on a "pilgrimage", so to speak, to sniff out new sexy fratboys who he could get it on with. this is a man who has been married twice, divorced once. this is a man who, when his name was being tossed around as a possible candidate for vp during mccain's campaign for president, quickly shacked up with a gorgeous blonde woman and, after losing the bid for vp, subsequently stopped seeing. the film even called HER to get her story, which she politely declined to give, saying something along the lines of "i think i should keep my mouth shut for now. call me in ten years, and i'll tell you a story." this man is a menace! and the major media outlets do everything in their power to keep his aberrant sexual lifestyle a secret! hilariously enough, he just tweeted about his recent decision to run for SENATE next year. let's see how that goes.

david dreier is the other scumbag that really burned me up. this guy is a major mindfuck though, because his partner is none other than his own chief of staff, brad w. smith! in the film, they analyze the travel expenses of dreier and smith since dreier has taken office and they always end up in the same exotic destination--one day apart. you would be shocked by the lavish vacation locations they have stayed at. brad w. smith also has the unusual privelege of making the highest possible salary allowed by law for a committee staff member: he makes roughly $30,000 more than any other chief of staff working for any house of representatives committee chair. dirty dirty nepotism. AND dreier is one of the foremost vocal opponents of same-sex legal rights, "which includes support of the Defense of Marriage Act, as well as votes against gay adoption, and against inclusion of homosexuals as a protected class in hate crime and employment discrimination legislation." [1] due to the huge outcry from gay advocate organizations concerning his anti-gay voting record, he voted against the federal marriage amendment, saying he didn't feel like the consitution was a document that should restrict the rights of citizens. what a champ.

this is a really informative, scandalous film and i urge anybody living in the cities that it will be playing to go out and see it. you're definitely gonna hear more about it, especially with next year's upcoming election. here's a list of opening dates for select cities:

May 8
San Francisco, CA: Landmark Theatres Embarcadero Center
West Hollywood, CA: Sunset 5
Washington, DC: E Street Cinema
New York City, NY: Clearview Chelsea 9
Philadelphia, PA: Ritz at the Bourse

May 15
Fort Lauderdale, FL: Gateway 4
Tallahassee, FL: Miracle 5
Seattle, WA: Landmark Varsity

May 22
Santa Cruz, CA: Nickelodeon Theatres
Chicago, IL: Music Box
South Coast Village, Costa Mesa CA
Camelot 3, Palm Springs CA

June 5
Tucson, AZ: The Loft Cinema
San Diego, CA: Hillcrest

i must confess though, charlie crist was fucking hot in college. i would have fucked him.

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